La Camisa Negra

Discovering Juanes

Best part of my Colombian visit is knowing where Juanes lives in Medellin. Leo and Giovanni drove me while Alejandro took me to El Tesoro, an Ayala like high-end mall and finally got his CD, Mi Sangre Tour edition

www.youtube.com

www.youtube.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQN5ZRugVzc

Nuevas Palabras

Nuevas Palabras

Colombian locals have a treasure of localized Spanish words very distinct from the traditional Spanish (Castellano). My friends, tour guide and taxistas taught me a few.

Aca - - here (not aqui)

Arguadiente – a typical liquor in Colombia seems like gin to me.

Bacano - something good

Bandeja Paisa - a heavy plate of meal with chorizo, carne, carne and many carne!

Bien dotado – well endowed ( I won’t go there far to explain…..)

Chevere - something good – they say que chevere!

Chimba - same as chevere – they say que chimba! o muy chimba.

Chino/chinezo – a friend of someone’s friend ( not Chinese)

Costeno/Costena- people from the coast side of Colombia (Cali, Santa Marta, Cartagena)

Finka - a house in the farm or a ranch

Paisa - people from Medellin

Parcero – friend ( not amigo)

Pollo/polla or gallina- a teenager or a young guy/lady ( Pollo is chicken in Spanish. Colombians are fund of making yummy chicken soup. So the young ones are like chicken soup, amen!)

rollo/rolla- people from Bogota

Rumba – dance/disco ( rumbear - to go to a discoteca)

Tirititir - to make love ( or they say hacer un tirititi)

Colombians don’t say “de nada” as a response to your “Thank you”. They would instead reply – “Con mucho gusto.”

When you are in a market place, they would say “ A su orden mi amor.” At your service sir/my love.” How’s that for you? Instantly somebody calls you mi amor. Que ricoooo!

Gracias Jose Raul, Alexander, Giovanni, Leo y Alejandro. Parceros, fue una chimba estar con vosotros. Hasta luego bacanos.

Viva Colombia!

Que Boludo!

Que Boludo!

I was denied entry in Buenos Aires, sent back to Colombia for an immigration official's lack of knowledge in interpreting my visa.

April 3, 2010, Buenos Aires, Argentina, this day will never be forgotten. I was a victim of someone’s ignorance, of someone’s greatest exercise and display of arrogance. He is a moron.

Arriving from Bogota, Colombia via flight LA 4641. I was refused entry by an immigration chief in Buenos Aires for his erroneous interpretation of my visa, which he declared expired. The truth of the matter is, it is not. The Argentine Consulate in Manila later confirmed this to me through an e-mail.

I was holding a multiple-entry business visa for 15 days with three-month validity issued in Manila on February 3, 2010 by the Argentine Embassy. I entered Buenos Aires using this visa on February 16, 2010 spending ten good days of business and leisure leaving me 5 more allowable days on my next entry within three months. Hence, my supposed three day-visit this April.

I am collecting the frame of a leather chair I bought in my first visit from The Sweater, Inc. in Buenos Aires, a company that sells fine leather goods mostly from cow.

Apparently, when the first immigration officer examined my documents, he didn’t know how to interpret the type of visa I was holding. He referred my case to his superior who declared it expired. He explained that it has expired after 15 days from my first entry. (Mute button on…) Duh! Then what’s the three-month validity clause for? Please explain Mr. Officer!

The not so dumb junior officer seemed unconvinced of his superior’s interpretation, approached the lady officer in the next cubicle and referred my case with her. They discussed and were later interrupted by the smart officer who called him to come to his office. I took the opportunity to approach the lady who was in a rush to take her break and asked her if something was wrong with my visa because I was the last man standing from flight LA 4641. She quickly said, in my opinion there is NONE. Then the rest of the officers were greeting each other Feliz Pascua and exchanged besos and rushed home. I realized then it was already Easter Sunday.

I politely told the immigration officer that he might have just been mistaken. I told him I had been issued same type of visas from several Schengen States and the immigration officials didn’t interpret it that way. Further, I explained to him that I had been issued Argentine visas for the last five years, give or take. If I may recall, I clarified this matter with their consulate in Manila two years ago but he is the type of officer who doesn’t listen to reasons. With such a commanding voice he said, “You were badly informed by our Embassy in Manila!”

(Mute push button on por favor!) Really sir? Then you are the smart guy and the people from your Manila office are the stupid ones? Vale?

He ordered for my immediate return to my port of origin via LAN, which is Bogota, which left Buenos Aires in the next hour.

I appealed that he would give me a chance to call the Embassy of the Philippines in Buenos Aires for a possible assistance regarding my case but he said, “NO! What we do in Argentina is independent from what the Philippine Embassy does.”

“What’s the point of allowing Embassies and Consulates in Argentina Sir? I don’t understand. You are so contagious!” (Mute button on again!)

I was immediately escorted to the plane. They sequestered my old and new passports and made me take the LA 2428 flight to Lima. Then at Lima Airport, I also had an escort and I was not allowed to get hold of my passports up to Medellin, Colombia, my next destination entering Colombia as a tourist this time. (Mute button please...) “Please explain to me, why am I being treated like a criminal. I am not going anywhere! I'm taking the flight to Colombia. Give me back my passports. I am holding a 10-year multiple visa to the United States, most of the stamps there are B2 with 6 months allowable stay. I will not over stay in your country! Besides you already refused me entry. Give them back to me baby, now, Ahora mismo! Pronto tonto!”

A LAN crew handed over my passports to the immigration officials in Colombia. The Colombian officer asked me to explain why I was denied entry in Buenos Aires and what’s with the visa problem Buenos Aires had declared in my papers. I explained and showed him my visa and he smiled and said after inspecting it that to his understanding it is valid. He then welcomed me and granted me entry to Colombia. (Mute button for the real smart guy….) “Thank you sir, you are the one! A person like you should be the one’s to be commissioned in all immigration offices in the whole civilized and modern world! Viva Colombia!”

In Lima, airport and LAN officers opined that there is nothing wrong with my visa, it is valid and it has not yet expired and that Buenos Aires should have granted me three-day stay.

(Intermission please) _-A perfect 10 - a los peruanos y colombianos, y el otro 10 para el senor en Buenos Aires por ser ganador de Moron Olympics y no nos olvidemos un plaque para el senor Filipino por ser un victima! Vale? Muchas Gracias! A sus orden senor, con mucho gusto!!!

I believe I was not accorded with my proper rights as a stranger in Argentina. Understand that when Argentines come and visit the Philippines, they can stay in the country for 20 days without visa. I didn’t see any show of reciprocity in its smallest form or some kind of consideration just for three days in Buenos Aires from this immigration officer.

He made a costly mistake. I paid dearly for someone's incapacity to deliver his job . Que Boludo!

Reminiscing India

My sobrino Jose had just finished his 16-month work contract as a marinero in an Arab tanker based in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. Last week, we picked him up at the airport with my sis and the rest of her family. He’s on shore now but most of all he’s home at last.

I can say we have a very good bonding even though we have a 12 year age gap. He enjoys being with me, to the point that sometimes if not oftentimes he invades my privacy. As expected, he went straight to my flat right from the airport and there goes my privacy out of the window again.

He had the chance to work and be with Indian seafarers. He has fond memories of them. The other day, we watched this year's Academy Award Winner Slum Dog Millionaire. I paid much attention on the scenes about Agra and Taj Mahal. The movie brought back good memories of my Delhi and Agra trip in 2006.

Jose on the other hand recalls his Indian colleagues. He’d say, his mobile phone was bought for him by an Indian friend because he didn’t had an off-shore break in Dammam. He asked himself in a melancholic way if will he be able to see them again. I told him, “I guess so.”

For the good Indian’s who touched our lives… I share these priceless fotos. Thank you so much!

A Case of Bebe Gandang-Hari

This is for Oryx and his Brazilian friend who had a falling-out over a sexy mulatta. The Brazilian guy had a record-breaking torrid kissing bout with her at the dance-floor of The Embassy one Saturday night. The crowd cheered while The Oryx distanced himself from the scene ashamed of what was going on.

The Brazilian got mad with Oryx when he learned much later that the girl he was about to take home turned out to be a Bebe Gandang Hari. Too late for him to realize that she was a he. And poor Oryx got the blame for his failure to warn him.

So here’s your rhyme Oryx. Thank you for sharing it with me. One day when you visit Brazil, you will understand why your friend failed to notice the Bebe in her.

At the beaches of Rio, you might get confused as well…. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Mucho miedo que tengas
De la mujer con barbillas,
Aunque sea encantada,
Todavía tiene la polla.
Se parece como una hembra
Ya que la verdad está en sombra
Que tengas mucho cuidado -
La Bebé no tiene coño!

Mystic India

New Delhi

Just three days after the exit of Year 2005, I got a call from the headquarters of my client in India to fly to New Delhi before their SAP system goes live.

It was my first time in Mystic India, home to one of the world's oldest civilizations.

It was not a usual preparatory landing announcement I heard a few minutes before our plane touches down the runway of Indira Gandhi Int’l Airport. One of the flight attendants of Air India announced that the plane must be disinfected, then much earlier than I thought, they came spraying the whole aircraft with air disinfectant. That caused zero visibility inside the plane, which almost triggered my asthma.

My team worked like crazy for over 14 hours daily at my client’s office and in our hotel rooms drowning ourselves with coffee to keep us mentally alert.

A few times we would take a break and see New Delhi at night as it was impossible to explore the city by day with the overwhelming tasks to be done. We explored some good Indian restaurants and ate authentic Indian cuisine rich with spices and flavours. It was a gastronomic feat for me, but to my colleague, it was a nightmare not to mention the discomfort she endures at the toilet every morning. So the rest of the trip she fed herself with Mc Donald’s vegetarian burger and fries.

New Delhi is beautiful with its tree-lined boulevards. Though I felt something creepy inside once our car would pass line of trees full of crows especially when they turned New Delhi’s blue sky to black as they took their flight just like in the horror movies.

My hard work was rewarded when my client announced on my last day that they are taking me to Agra, to see Taj Mahal, one of the 8 wonders of the world.

I enjoyed the long drive from New Delhi to the City of Agra. On our way, it was an interesting sight seeing India’s holy cows in all shapes and sizes roaming around, freely, untouched, and feeding on whatever they find edible in the streets, neighbourhood backyards, and open fields. In this part of the world, cows are considered sacred. Cows are not being turned to burgers here, so forget about that quarter pounder meal you craved for at Mc Donald’s. After all, India’s authentic dishes will never fail your quest for a unique gastronomic experience.

Taj Mahal is considered as the jewel of Muslim art. It’s a picture of perfect symmetry of structures, made of high quality white marble.

Behind the beauty of this UNESCO declared World Heritage Site is a sad love story of an Indian Emperor Shah Jahan and his favourite third wife Mumtaz Mahal, who died after giving birth to their 14th child. Taj Mahal was constructed by the emperor as a final resting place for his wife.

The construction cost was so immense that it caused the emperor’s post after a coup was successfully staged against him by his son. The building of Taj Mahal almost led the empire to bankruptcy.

However, in these days, it placed Agra in the world map, drawing millions of tourists annually.

Before the day tour was over, I took time to queue and have my picture taken at the bench where one can have the full background of this wonder of the world. Celebrities like John Lennon and Yoko Ono posed there, even the royalties of England like Prince Charles and the late Princess Diana.

Cheap Chao "Surrenders"

So what's up Cheap Chow? You started the war and surrendered too early? Can't stand this coming Sunday the fury of angry 130,000 servants who will lambast you, curse you, and would be very mean to you... that their words will reverberate in your thoughts on and on and on and you would regret your life how on earth you were so damn racist???

Know what???? We are happy reading this in one of our dailies.... " Que hijueputa eres.. cabron de mierda!!!"
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"HONG KONG—Now contrite, a Hong Kong writer who angered the Philippines with his article poking fun at the country, says he actually admires Philippine democracy and music and would like to someday visit the country he had derisively called a “nation of servants.”

He says among the places he would like to visit is “Fort McKinley,” a name that now seems to exist only in the dimming memories of old-timers, having been renamed Fort Bonifacio more than four decades ago."